She Had the Right Idea
by Hart-of-Tree-Hill
Summary: "If Pam from seven years ago could see her right now she would get a nice slap to the face, and probably deservedly so." Companion piece to "He Had the Right Idea", Pam centric, set near the end of season nine.


**A/N:** **This is a companion piece to "He Had the Right Idea", and is set near the episode "Paper Airplanes". It follows the same format as the first one, but is instead from Pam's perspective. Enjoy and review!**

If Pam from seven years ago could see her right now she would get a nice slap to the face, and probably deservedly so.

She was being stubborn, she knew it. There needed to be some give and take, some compromise, but for some reason she just couldn't do it.

Jim had every right to chase his dreams, to strive for something greater than being a sales associate at Dunder Mifflin Scranton. He had always been supportive of her dreams to be an artist, and those were way further out than him starting a business about something he's passionate about.

So why all of a sudden was she so set on not leaving Scranton, or her glamorous job as office administrator?

She didn't like to think about it often, but truthfully this reminded her a bit of her relationship with Roy, and the "high" aspirations that he had had. Except, and this was the really sickening thing, in this situation _she_ was Roy. She was the one who was content working at an excruciatingly boring office job and never going any higher than that. She had become Roy.

Roy wasn't even that version of himself now. He had made something of himself, was successful and married, and honestly? She was so happy for him.

A part of her had always felt sort of bad that she had broken off the wedding like that but seeing him now, so happy, so much happier than she ever could have made him, made her happy.

There was a disturbing coincidence though wasn't there? Now that Roy was without her, he was thriving, now that her and Jim's marriage was falling apart at the seams he was thriving. The common denominator? Her.

All this time she had thought that Roy was holding her back but maybe it was the other way around.

Back then she hated how he had just expected them to work at Dunder Mifflin for the rest of their lives, never expecting more or reaching for more. Now that she was with someone who could see beyond the fluorescent lights of Dunder Mifflin she didn't want that?

Pam from seven years ago would have given _anything_ to be with someone who desired more. Granted she would have assumed it would be Roy but still.

Where was the Pam who went to art school? What the hell happened to her?

She grew up, had a family, and now was essentially performing the job of a single mother.

Except that wasn't really true was it? Single mothers don't have the unwavering support of their significant other, and despite her and Jim's current flaws, he never once told her not to do something.

It wasn't even that she didn't want him to be successful, because more than anything she loved to see her family happy. But they _just_ had a baby, and they have Cece who isn't much older, now was just not the ideal time for this. Which is why they _as a team_ decided that he wouldn't take the job. It had been his idea too. What hurt the most was probably that he had gone behind her back, he lied to her. They didn't do that, they never ever lied to each other, but now here they were back to dancing around each other, not saying what they were truly feeling.

She knew that putting all of the blame on Jim was totally unfair, some of the blame maybe, but not all of it. Part of that blame belonged to her and she knew it.

Jim was trying, he really was, he was doing his best to be there for his family while he had a company starting up in Philly, but it just wasn't working.

The thought was absolutely devastating, but maybe they had run their course together, maybe they would just hold each other back.

She took a quick glance to her left at Jim, who had been secretly looking at her with those sad and unsure eyes, determined not to lose her, and knew she was wrong.

This wasn't the relationship where both parties were hindrances to the other. No that had been her ten year long relationship from seven years ago. She and Jim gave each other life. Well he gave her life at least.

This wasn't fair to Jim, he really was trying, but she was being stubborn.

She wasn't ready to give up on them, not so easily. They had a hard road ahead that she was sure of, but she knew it would be so worth it.

If Pam from seven years ago could see how low her dreams and aspirations were right now she would get a swift kick to the butt and then told to be grateful that she had someone who wanted to be the best that he could for her.

 **A/N:** **Not a ton of content but I just find the dynamic between the two in season 9 to be so frustrating. Although I was team Pam on this one, both of them were in the wrong, and truthfully I feel that the writers made the characters completely hypocritical of what they had always been. I do have one last companion piece to this one where Jim and Pam actually interact following these inner struggles and thoughts. If you're interested in that let me know. Leave a review!**


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